9.09.2009

The Ugly Truth

Simply put cancer sucks...

We knew when daddy had the tumor removed from his leg last year, there was a chance it could spread and if it did, it would most likely be to his lungs. Those of you that have been around for awhile know that daddy went through chemo treatments and lived with us for a while(you can click on my labels for daddy or papa george if you want to read the history) and when he couldn't stand another treatment he called it quits and moved on to radiation treaments.

A few weeks ago he had some tests done, then a biopsy and his type of cancer a fast growing sarcoma had indeed reared it's ugly head...again, this time, in both of his lungs...

He had an appointment with his cancer care doctor last week, options were discussed, questions were asked, best and worst case scenarios were given. When it was all said and done daddys last question no wait statement was 'If I start this chemo again ya'll are going to have to work around my trail riding- I NEED this week off RIGHT here' I think that says a lot, a man faced with what he was told pretty much says I AM GONNA LIVE MY LIFE his way, his terms...

Today daddy re-started chemo treatments, I agreed to meet him there after I got all the childrens off to school, as I'm driving I am thinking over all the dr had told us last week, things like, it's fast growing, both lungs, best case 5 yrs worst case less than a year, it will proably come back, surgery is a last resort-it's hard on you and would require 2 surgeries, a few people have beat this, MD Anderson reccomends these drugs, it won't be as hard on you this time and then I started to cry...

I am not a big crier, I protect my heart with a wall, I stand firm, I'm a control freak, I have even been called intimidating,vulnerable ME? NEVER, no one OR nothing is gonna break me...well that was until this morning...

When I realized this time is different, daddy won't be going to a hospital to have the cancer removed like last time, this time they are treating the beast growing in his lungs the best way they know, it's a waiting game and we won't know if the treatments are working until late Oct/first of Nov when they do another CT.

A thought entered my mind as I was driving actually more of a mental picture and it was of daddy standing at the scheduling desk saying 'Now I need these dates right here off from treatments for horse rides, hey do you ride' then I laughed and then I realized I had driven 10 miles past his Dr office.

His treatment went well, it was short and it is different this time, 1 day a week for 2 weeks off a week then repeat for 6 cycles-which is why chemo should be easier on his body this go around.

Before we left daddy had to stop by the scheduling desk to make his next appointment and this is what I heard...

'Now I need these dates right here off from treatments for horse rides, hey do you ride' That, my friends, is GOD....

My confession for today: His way His terms...ride daddy ride...


67 comments:

  1. I do so love you...you are just amazing! I am praying for your Daddy he sounds like he is as amzing as you are!

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  2. wow!!!!!! i do not know what else to say!!!!! he must be an amazing man!!!
    i have to say i got tears in my eyes reading this!!!!!!!
    you are in my thoughts and prayers!!!!!
    i have quite a picture in my head of him telling them he needs some time off to go riding....that is just sooooo sweet!!!!!

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  3. So sorry to hear it's returned, but man, what spirit! Life is so hard, sometimes.

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  4. I am praying for you and him, Georgie! Get that man a Snuggie!

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  5. We'll be praying for your family. I admire his spirit!

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  6. I'm laughing and crying at the same time. I love your daddy. His will is strong and this is a good thing my friend. I would ride with him if I lived closer, and could get on a horse, or had ever been on one in my life. Not that any of that is important.

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  7. Oh, Georgie! I am so sorry to hear this news. I have tears running down my face.

    Prayers are with your dad and your whole family.

    xox

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  8. I'm so sorry. My prayers are with you. I'll tell you something, it's all about the power of will. I truly believe it. My grandma lived with cancer, did everything she wanted too, for four years longer than they'd given her to survive.

    You just never know.

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  9. Wow. I like your dad.
    Praying for you guys.

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  10. I'm so sorry. This is so hard. But what an amazing Dad you have!!! I love that he said that, right when you needed to hear him say it.

    Peace to you,
    Heather

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  11. Ride daddy ride...I love that! This was such a very sweet post. So heartfelt and loving.

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  12. Sounds like he has a great spirit. your family is in my prayers.

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  13. It's not just his spirit that I am amazed by; it's your too.

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  14. I'm sorry this has happened to your dad. If he's anything like you, I'm sure he'll be strong and fight. Prayers are being offered up from the Smoochiefrog household. :)

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  15. You might just need to go riding with him....You'll reget it if you don't.

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  16. I smiled at the courage and strong will that your daddy has! He will be riding for a long time because of that determination. Hope that there's nothing but good news for you all.

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  17. Sounds like you get your "tough" AND your heart from your dad. :) I take it you'll be riding with him soon?

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  18. This blog was so well written! I hate cancer too! There are no other words to say but enjoy the time you get to have with him! ;)

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  19. Oh Georgie....I am sitting here just crying! It is God! And yes, let your Daddy ride and enjoy every minute of it! I like his spunk and I see where you get it. I love you girl!

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  20. I'm so sorry Georgie! I always dread those "results after the scans" appointments. Ours is coming up in a couple of weeks~
    Your sweet Dad has a great attitude! I love how he is so confident that he will still be riding during his treatment that he has carved out the time already! WAY TO GO DAD!!!
    I'll add him to my nightly prayers. Take good care~
    ♥,Lilly

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  21. I am so sorry yoru daddy is sick again. I will be saying a prayer for him and for you. HUGS honey.

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  22. 'Now I need these dates right here off from treatments for horse rides, hey do you ride'

    YES! I LOVE IT! OMG, I had no idea your Dad was a horseman! Now I am shedding super huge tears. My Dad loved horses and I never got to say one word to him (he died before I turned 2) but I inherited his love for horses. Just hold onto every single moment you can Georgie. He's living his life and you will love him for it forever.

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  23. Awesome that he rides and can get his mind off the treatments.
    Don't forget to take some time for you. This sounds like a full family battle.

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  24. Cancer DOES suck, Georgie...I will keep your dad in my prayers!

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  25. Georgie--
    I'm not sure there's anything that I can say that hasn't been said except that Love, prayers and thoughts sent to you and your family by Ken and I. Cancer is a bad bad word and both of us have been touched by it through others. Your Dad sounds like he has spunk as his daughter does!!
    I don't know what I can do but if you need anything, please let me know!!!

    Melinda :)

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  26. Oh Georgie....but what a guy! I like his way of thinking...hold on to that and I'm praying for y'all!

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  27. Your daddy is SPUNKY!! And God is Good!!! I'm praying for His rich blessings on your daddy, you, and all of your family.

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  28. I love this post... you have a great perspective! And I love especially your last sentence... dad's terms. That is LOVE. You're an awesome girl!

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  29. Cancer is such a BAD roller coaster ride and it affects the entire family. Laughter, then tears - all the raw emotions a person has laid bare. They said Ted Kennedy kept sailing, refusing to quit, even as he fought his Cancer battle. Glad your Dad is "riding" and doing what he enjoys. He is blessed to have his family respecting his wishes of how he will live his life. *HUGS*

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  30. I am praying of your Dad and for you. It sounds like your Dad is a fighter and will be the boss, which is a really good thing. HUGS!!

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  31. Wow! Thanks for sharing that about your dad. I hope all goes well for him with the treatments and that he is able to do his rides.

    Yep. Cancer sucks.

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  32. Prayers are definitely with you and your family.
    My uncle was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago and he's going through chemo.
    Your father sounds like a great guy living by his terms.

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  33. I just "stumbled" here and was immediately brought back to memories of a similar situation with my own father. What a good example he is setting for you and those around him. He sounds like someone I'd be proud to know. Wishing and praying the best for you both..

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  34. Oh, Georgie. I'm so sorry. But what a wonderful daddy you have. I know you enjoy every moment, learning from him, enjoying his sense of humor.

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  35. Hey there Georgie Girl!
    I am so very sorry to hear this, but I think your dad has it right. He obviously isnt worried in it to much. I think we all know who is in control. Give that worry to teh Lord. I also know its alot easier said than done, so I will be praying for you and your Daddy.
    ANd dang, if your dad and my mom were to meet they would have lots to discuss. She rides. HAd a horse for years, now a mule (for years). She also goes off to trailrides (like camps) The Buffalo Trail Ride is one. Heard of it? She goes a week in the summer. I think its in Ga or TN?
    Ride, Daddy! RIde it out. Keep your feet int eh sterraps and hang on the horn. The ride may be bumpy but it is the roads less traveled that we learn so much about ourselves and strength.
    Your in my prayers!
    HUGS!

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  36. My eyes are filled with tears. I wish you all the best.

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  37. I'm so sorry for all that he is going through. This has got to be hard on all of you! He sounds like an amazing man with an incredible outlook on things!

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  38. I am so sorry Georgie. I lost my mom to lung cancer when I was just 18, and all too soon after getting the news. Prayers for your daddy.

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  39. I think cancer is one of the only diseases which has affected everyone in someway. Your Dad sounds like an incredible guy, I pray the treatment goes the best it can.

    SE x

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  40. That totally sucks Georgie. I'll be praying for him and your family. And I'm glad he's living his life how he wants.

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  41. Lots of prayers for all of yall.

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  42. Your daddy sounds like a remarkable man, Georgie, and you are a remarkable daughter. Praying for your family...

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  43. Wow. What spirit. :-) Praying for all of you.

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  44. Your right to recogonize your dad is his own man and let him be
    will be hard many times but you also have laughter through tears at times
    all my prayers for you and your dad

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  45. God bless your father. He sounds like he is a strong man. He is in my prayers.

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  46. Oh dear, that really does suck terribly. We have had many family members go through cancer treatments during the last couple of years and it was much more of an emotional experience than I ever could have imagined. I'm glad the treatment is going well. And yes, trail riding is definitely too important to give up, even during cancer treatment.

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  47. Prayers and hugs from my way, for you and your dad

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  48. {{{{{{{{{{{{Georgie}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm nearly in tears here. Mostly because of the strength and determination your father is showing. The chances may be slim, but it sounds like your dad is the kind of man to beat this thing if at all possible. Keep praying and imagining those tumors shrinking shrinking shrinking, and Dad might just kick some cancer ASS!
    What kind of riding does he do? Is he a rancher?

    Keep your chin up girl.

    Justine :o )

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  49. I am so sorry that your dad is having to go through this again. What a difficult time for everyone. Although, your Dad's attitude is AWESOME. Really, I am totally inspired by him and love that you shared this with us. His attitude will definitely help...!

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  50. You have my sympathies ... this can't be easy. But your dad sounds like a wonderful man -- and people who know how to live and intend to live on their own terms usually do well with stuff like this and at least you know he's living the life he wants. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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  51. It is my most fervent hope that I NEVER have to choose between chemo and no chemo. I'm not brave enough to take chemo, and too big a coward to say "NO CHEMO". But I hope, if the time comes, I say "NO".

    Your dad is giving it his best shot while doing it on his terms. Bless his bravery. I know he's doing it for you more than for himself.

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  52. I am sorry to hear that it is back. I will pray for him & the rest of your family. Keep your head held high, it sounds like he is a fighter. Hugs to you!

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  53. I started reading your blog for the first time with this sad part of your life. It reminds me again how valuable our life and we have to enjoy everything. I pray for you..

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  54. Seems odd writing what I'm about to write seeing as how beautiful this post is...but since you have posted since, I have nowhere else to write it.

    I'm so glad to hear that my pups aren't the only stinky pups around!! :)

    Hallie

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  55. Ooh, I'd love to meet him! I love ..."His Terms, His Way"....

    Ride on, Daddy! Ride!!

    I've been praying and I'll keep praying, Georgie. You keep strong, cowgirl. You're kicking a fat hog in the butt. Keep on!!

    XOXOXOXO

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  56. I LOVE him....you teared me up big time with your post!...being a cancer survivor...I am so humbled by his attitude...and am putting him in my prayers that he'll be able to ride...for a long time to come....

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  57. I cried your whole post. I am sorry you have to go through this, but he has chosen to do it his way, good for him, and you because you know he's going to enjoy life instead of worrying.
    You all will continue to be in my prayers. Just give a shout if you need anything.

    {{Big Hugs}}

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  58. Darling, have a lovely weekend.

    Love, Hugs & Tea
    Duchess ♥♥♥

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  59. Georgie thanks for sharing this story. Your dad is a brave man, my prayers are with him.

    Michael

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  60. Words cannot tell you how sorry I am. Hugs and prayers being sent your way.

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  61. I'm sorry, Georgie. I love your dad; he sounds like a real sweetheart! I'll keep you both in my prayers.

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  62. I was going to say what Anonymous above said, but instead I will tell you that you are a brave and caring daughter and I wish the best for you and your father.

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  63. Wow, I love how you were so caught up in your mental picture that you drove way past the hospital. Something I would totally do. I think it is great that it is on his terms and he is still living his life. I hope they can shrink that beast into nothing!! Stay strong girl!

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  64. Good for him living on his terms. He's a strong man and a good role model. I'll pray for him and your family!!!

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  65. Georgie, I am sorry that your dad and you are going through this. I admire the strength in both you & him.

    I can definitely sympathize. My dad is fighting liver cancer and I agree the waiting game is the most difficult part.

    I can honesty say " I HATE CANCER"! :-)

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