10.02.2009

Friday Fragments & VGNO

If you are looking for the SSS info click here-it is the 'official' SSS 411 and if you plan on joining us this year-I hope you will take the time to read it as we are doing things a little differently.

Normal is so over-rated...I now give you the reality that IS my life and my mind as of late...I guess I can call it, the Wal*Mart parking lot edition that happened in one day...

While trying to catch a catnap waiting in the car in the wal-mart parking lot while Abby ran in, I noticed several things:

1) Some 40 something male perv (yes I know that word is so very judgemental of me-I have already asked for forgivness) breaking his neck for a look at my almost 16 yr old and since I am not in my right mind, sleep deprivation does strange things to you, I yelled from my open window...

'SHE'S 15 YOU PERV' then I slid down in my seat

2) Once I declared it was safe to sit up I watched as the cart rally guys gathered up the carts that were left all over the parking lot, narrowly missing parked cars because they(the cart rally guys) were apparently 'over-compensating' as the stacks of carts they pushed grew and grew, the whole mentality of mines bigger than yours...

3) I noticed some lace laden handcuffs hanging from someones SUV rearview  mirror, then I wondered if the person that drove the car had kids and how on earth they explained something like that to them...then since the cuffs were hanging in the car I hoped they had lysol, and again since the cuffs were hanging in the car I could only imagine what their bedroom looked like...then I secretly hoped they would come out of wal*mart before Abby so I could see who the person was, then I laughed at me for being nosey

4) I saw a mom come out of my local small*mart and she had 6 girls, S-I-X ( I can barely handle the 2 I have, I just can't fathom 6), they were all so sweet, holding hands and hanging on the cart, helping each other-so unlike my own childrens,  I could feel the love from across the parking lot, I contemplated asking her what kind of drugs she gave them...but I was affraid she would think I was junkie since I was bra-less,had wild hair and dark circles under my eyes...

 I immediately thought of Jess and this 'phase' she is going through-I say phase because it better be or you all will be seeing my mug flashed across your nightly news. Her phase is driving me insane, leaving me to question my stellar parenting skills or lack thereof depending on the day.

Simply put, I forgot it was her Birthday and have been paying the price for being the worlds worst mother-you all have done that right? RIGHT! Lie to me for petes sake, PLEASE. Well all the days leading up to her big day I kept saying I need to get a card, I need to do this, do that, then Tuesday rolls around and she is leaving for school and she says So I Guess NO ONE meaning me is going to tell me Happy Birthday!

It doesn't matter to a 12 yr old that you have spent 10 days straight at a hospital and there was no exscuse I could offer, I SUCK! So... Oh you want your ear cartlidge pierced-sure hunny(seriously she got her ear cartlidge pierced), you wanna take all your money out of savings and blow it on skittles and air heads-no problem(I can not confirm or deny this one), You want me to rub your stinky feet-I LIVE to rub your feet baby, YES I swear YOU are my favorite!

Where was I...ah yes, the parking lot...

5) I 'hear' some 20 something male talking loudly on his cell about how he got pulled over and he didn't have a drivers lic yada yada yada, he is just walking back in forth in the lot talking as if the person on the other end of the phone has a hearing aide, then out comes my Abby and out comes his neck crooning and this time instead of yelling and sliding, I stared at him as she walked to the car, I slid my sunglasses down so he could see me in all my bra.less.wild.hair.scary.dark.under.eye.circle.glory.giving.him.my.stink.eye, then I opened my car door all the while making eye contact with him-staring him down, I was fully prepared to chase him down, tackle him and personally show him the 'Exorcist' head turn while penning his hands behind his back with my knees and possibly spew some green vomit for good measure just to make sure he thinks twice the next time his eyes get the better of him...just keepin it real

It's Friday and I am taking my first day off in 11 days from my home away from home, St Francis, in just 2 short weeks Abby and Jess have managed to rack up between them 1 F, 3 Ds and 4 Cs, my attendance is required at their schools today, my family wants their mom/wife back. Everyone except Jess  wants my nose in their bidness again.

Abby has started leaving me notes saying things like:

momo I need to talk to you
momo I need lunch money
momo I cried today
momo 6 girls got cheer demerits but I wasn't one of them *YAY ME*
I am not sure why she calls me 'momo' but I like it

Jess has also left me a few notes:

GEORGINA I am soooooo mad at you
Gina can I go to Church with Julianna on Wed
Georgie I am still mad at you
Gina I need lunch money
Georgina  MOM GINA yep still mad
I have no idea why she calls me by my first name and the variations of it but I don't like it, but she is 12 and quite frankly scares the crap out of me at times...just sayin

Reese, well, he sent me a text: because REAL men don't leave notes and I don't even text-Eric reminds me constantly that I just cost him 10cents-men

Yo I need lunch money

I also left a note:

Dear Family, I need a THERAPIST! Love Mom

This post brought to you by:

Friday Fragments?

Click over to Half-Past Kissin' Time to see more Friday Fragments


My confession for today: I should be in Dallas at Jills house, have a drink for me girlies, that way I can claim I am there in 'spirit' get it? ahhh I slay me-yep i'm sleep deprived

Tonight I am joining in Ann Agains VGNO so if you have nothing better to do tonight click over to join in the fun

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40 comments:

  1. I am so glad I have only one child. I keep telling myself only 4 years of high school... I really hope I can make it!

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  2. Oh, scary and funny at the same time. My oldest probably won't be sassy, but my little girl is destined to be a drama queen with a side of sass. If my hubby had been in the parking lot with those rubber neckers I don't think I could have kept him in the car!! Good luck!!

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  3. oh girlfriend!!! I so want to hug your neck!!! As you know - I have 3 boys and my 11 year old seems to be acting like your 12 year old girl! UGH! I love him to pieces....but right now i do NOT like him!!! He has this "attitude" and thinks he is "all that!" OH NO HE DIDN'T! Momma gonna have to put a foot up someone's.....
    ANYWAY- sounds like YOU need to come hang at the Tulsa State Fair and eat your little heart out for a few hours! Then laugh at all the "craziness" you see and be THANKFUL for those precious children at home! LOL! :)
    And yes - Wal-Mart parking lot has scared me before too. In fact BA Wal-Mart (on 71st) some dude left a note on my windshield before said he "noticed I didn't have a wedding ring on and would like to get to know me better." REALLY?! I was walking in the flipping store!!! That is SCARY stuff, man!!!
    Hope you have a great restful weekend!

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  4. I cannot tell you how much this post make me smile. I hope things get less crazy hectic for you. I'm still not sure how people do it with more than one child. One almost kills me off daily. :)

    Take care, Georgie. :)

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  5. Oh my, I am crying from laughing so hard. I know it's wrong. I wish I could be there for you, but two months down the road when you re-read your post, I hope you laugh too!!
    Again, you and yours are in my prayers.

    I also have a blog award for you on my page.

    Love ya Girlie!

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  6. I love people watching at wal-mart! 6 girls! Wow! I wouldn't want to even try and tackle that! Have a great weekend!

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  7. I had to laugh at this-I can just see you, sitting there staring at those guys and giving them the evil-eye! Just think what it was like for me with 3, yes three, girls!

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  8. You crack me up! Thank God I have 3 boys! I just get the bad attitude!

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  9. I'm going to make my daughter read #1 so she can see I'm not the only "psycho mom"...I'm quoting her...LOL

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  10. DEEP Breath!!! At least they leave you messages.

    Just hang tough.

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  11. Yowza! lol

    I would have yelled at that 40 year old perv too. The things that makes me especially mad about men like that, is they probably have daughters that age. It is disgusting!

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  12. I love the notes from your daughters. Great FF!

    Enjoy your weekend.

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  13. oh my gosh.....you poor girl.....i hope you get some much needed sleep while you are at home!!!!!!!!
    and oh my.......you made my day......i really did laugh out loud!!!!!!!
    hope you are able to enjoy your time at home...gina...um i mean georgie or what ever you go by these days!!!!!!

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  14. You are awesome for eyeing that guy down. As for the 12-year-old, I think I was like that. You poor thing. Hang in there.

    Too bad about the handcuffs person. That might have made for an interesting post.

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  15. Georgie---
    Glad to a see your funniness back in action.
    I hope all is going well for your Dad--it is tough spending so much of your life and time at a hospital. Believe me I know. Nothing at home is smart enough to get done on its own, it just waits until you have the time to do it. Hopefully things will get back to some normalcy
    soon.
    Thanks for stopping by Dreaming--I have missed seeing you. Thanks also for the great comments too.
    Melinda

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  16. I have a 40-something GOOD friend and he grosses me out when he takes the weird glance at gals. Yuck!

    Love the text about lunch money. I don't "Do" texting, so I guess I'm safe! :o)

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  17. Does it help any for you to know that I have been thinking and praying for you and if I can do anything, anything at all even an ear to shout at that I'm hear, my cell is on FB and you have it on email! Love ya girl!

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  18. I've given the evil eye to gawkers too. They are so brazen with their lust and it makes me want to puke.

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  19. I adore your fragments - I would have totally done the same sort of people watching (and stink eye) that you did. :)

    6 girls? Sheesh...my ONE is a major handful...and I'm not looking forward to the tween years - she'll probably refer to me by my name (or variances of it), too. ;)

    Happy VGNO and FF! :)

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  20. Great post. I fear the age of 13 but it sounds like I may need to get myself ready a year sooner.

    I actually DO have a therapist and I only have 2 kids. I think 6 would send me over the edge, but I love them.

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  21. Good for you for shouting at the Perve. LMAO!!! Stopping in from the VGNO. Have a great weekend.

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  22. So glad I found your blog! I signed up for the SS too, how fun :) Happy VGNO!

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  23. I am sooooo not looking forward to having a 12 year old...

    Hold me.

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  24. I sure hope you get some much needed rest and your dad gets to feeling better. So glad my boys are not that old yet and not looking forward to it.

    Thanks for stopping by. Alot to post about but so little time lately. Boys birthdays are back to back then mine and we got some not so exciting news about my husband's health. I think I am on the verge of a breakdown.

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  25. So, this is the first time I've done VGNO and the first time I've been here, but I can tell already that you are a fun one! That was thoroughly entertaining. I have four kids, ages 4 months to 8 years, only one of whom is a girl. When I think about their teen years, it makes me die inside. And oh my gosh, I hadn't ever even CONSIDERED that I might have to witness grown men staring at my daughter like that. Eww. I may have to break out my can of whoopass.

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  26. Okay, reading this I am glad my girls our OUT of the house and own their own. It just made me remember a lot of EXACTLY those kinds of incidents that happened and I don't know for the life of me how I survived. Hang in there, it does get better! Cheers!

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  27. We should both be at Jill's. They are having way too much fun without us! I'm here getting caught up on a week's worth of blog reading, now that I can actually sit up on the couch without my head exploding!!!! Happy Saturday!

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  28. Uh huh, you know you're sleep deprived when you're getting your entertainment in the Walmart parking lot. That, and sneering at any man who dares look at your beautiful 15 year old. Ooh, the claws came out that day!

    Love that Abby calls you Momo, but ooh girl, Jess is in TROUBLE for calling you by your first name!

    Any idea when Dad will be released from the hospital? Is there anyone that can care for him once he's home? My thoughts and prayers are with you always.

    Justine ;o )

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  29. My mother forgot it was my birthday when I was 16. Boy did I punish her for that one. I still bring it up.

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  30. We're both in Oklahoma! :) Cool!

    I enjoyed browsing through some of your posts and plan on reading frequently now! Thanks for stopping by my page and leaving your encouraging words. It's definitely hard to hear God sometimes (like NOW for us).

    You have a fantastic blog! :)

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  31. Wow...I don't even know where to begin. This was funny and sad.
    I remember being 15 and loving the looks I would get from "old" (over 30) men.

    Your daughter is going through a phase. She will go through many more, and they will all be miserable. And then someday you will wake up and she will be wonderful and you will marvel at what a joy of a child you raised. :)

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  32. I signed up for SSS, I think. Tell me if I need to do more.
    My mom kept all my letters I wrote her in high school...some were definately drama! :)
    Can I have lunch money too?

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  33. Good for you for giving him the stink eye! Some guy said something pretty gross to my little sister and I just wanted to sock him in the face right there!

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  34. Geez Georgie. I thought I was stressed...

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  35. Cleasic Georgie with two hearts post. I rate 5 stars out of 4.
    I had a boss several years ago (he is out of town now) who in the summer just had to get home so he could to his neighborhood pool so he could "check out all the high school tail." H creeped the whole office out (mostly men). Stranger yet was he had a 16 year old daughter.

    I never did figure him out.

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  36. September was crazy and I am so behind. Thank you so much for stopping by so that I could then be reminded about SSS 2009! That definitely made me smile.

    Sure hope you are having a wonderful Monday!

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  37. I enjoyed picturing your skanky stinkeye, Georgie. Way too funny. I can't imagine what Mr.4444 would do to see that kind of stuff directed towards his daughter. I love that you sank down in the seat, too; that cracked me up!

    So sorry you muffed the beginning of the birthday thing. I might have done that once, what with never knowing when we're going to actually celebrate and all. Sorry you've felt so stretched...

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  38. Oh boy! You make me so excited for my 8 yr old to become a teenager...ha ha! :)

    Happy VGNO, a little late! Come over & check out my blog, I was honored this week & I'm excited to share the news! http://juliechats.blogspot.com/

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