7.28.2010

If You Really Knew Me...

I'm watching this new MTV show...if you really knew me with Abby last night, it is intense,raw,emotional and real...almost hard to watch as these young adults reveal things they have kept guarded,hidden away from the judgmental eyes/ears of their peers...

Abby stands firm in her convictions, knows right from wrong and is very shy which comes across as snobbish, after watching the show she gets on facebook and posts a 'if you really knew me' status update then she proceeds to tell others how shy she is and that there is going to be a 'new her' this year.

Of course I love her just the way she is BUT I get the whole shy factor and how not feeling comfortable in a big group setting can be and I also get how other people can judge you for being a shy, quiet person, it's not until they spend time with you that they realize you aren't a snob or think your better than anyone...

So I am going to do my own version of If You Really Knew Me...

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥I am a very giving person, if I have it and you needed it, it would be yours no questions asked, I would go without to be able to help someone out...

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥Even though I share on this blog all kinds of things, in person and in a big group setting I am pretty reserved and always feel awkward never quite knowing how to keep the flow of conversation going...I once set in my car before a big blogger meet-up coaching myself on conversation starters...I still BOMBED!

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥That shy factor I mentioned up there goes out the door with family...with family I am TOO opinionated and I am in the process of learning to keep my mouth shut...it is a slow process, the need to be in control and know everything that is going on is a powerful thing, but I am working on it...

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥I often feel like I have failed as a Mother...that I feel like no one respects me in this house especially when all I do is bend over backwards and sacrifice for my children...I am hopeful that one day they will realize how hard parenting is...

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥A principle of my childrens school once told me I was intimidating, I told her I was offended and I considered my involvement in my childrens education 'passion'...however that statement has haunted me for years...

If you really knew me then you would know that...

♥Due to recent events in my life I had to visit a doctor to get medication for depression and anxiety...

So tell me...IF I really knew YOU, WHAT would I know?

My confession for today: My glass is half full...


59 comments:

  1. I watched the same show yesterday!!! It was really amazing and very hard to watch in some parts. A major eye opener.

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  2. Sounds like an interesting show. I may steal this for my blog. That said, I'll tell you first that I am also quite shy in groups, which comes across as standoffish. I've been told I'm intimidating--I laughed and said I've always wanted to intimidate someone! Probably didn't win me any brownie points. And I feel like a failure as a mother. Depression meds have been my friends for about 20 yrs now.

    Half-full? Half-empty? Most of the time I can't even see the damn glass.

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  3. Just became a follower...I like this post a lot.

    While I am not shy at all, I do have a big mouth and often times say things I shouldn't say, you know speaking before thinking, that is my biggest problem and it has caused major problems in with one sister-in-law...

    I will have to look for this show, sounds like it could do me wonders...

    Thanks for the post!

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  4. Funny - I happen to be watching it right now. Makes me all teary 'cause it makes me think of my former students and all the crap these poor kids went through. Interesting show. :)

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  5. Reality TV shows, am not a big fan! But I loved reading your, 'If you really knew me then you would know that...' Got to know you much better.

    If you really knew me then you would know that am planning to quit my job, pack my bags and head home.

    If you really knew me then you would know that am finally thinking of getting married with my GF with whom I have been in love for six years.

    If you really knew me then you would know that I was a junkie.

    If you really knew me then you would know that I love visiting Decisionally Challenged every freaking day!

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  6. The key is do you know yourself. That is important to figure out all about yourself. Everything else will fall into place. You probably,personally, are not as bad as you think. We all have our hang ups. No one is perfect on this earth. You have brought me great pleasure in the past.

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  7. I'm all about the meds for depression. Thank heavens there is such a thing. I'm always fighting the glass half full thing too!

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  8. Nice post. I really like the concept. I'll have to try and catch the show sometime. It's funny how we're all so able to open up on our blogs, where anyone in the world can see what we write, yet in person, we often don't stand up to our own expectations. Anyway... depression medication is NOT a bad thing. Take it from someone who will always have to be on it!

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  9. This is a great post! If you really knew me...then you would see that you and I are alot alike! You could have written those very words about me!

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  10. I'm shy in groups, too. I'm sure I have come off as intimidating a few times. I wish I knew how to use that at the appropriate time!

    I sometimes feel I don't fit in although I don't go out of my way to try. ;-)

    I think we all feel under-appreciated at times. There's nothing wrong with asking for what you want (e.g. a few thank-yous and a positive attitude) !!

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  11. dont know you so well....but so understand
    and take meds too
    hope you get the right ones quickly
    they do help

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  12. thank you for sharing. what a great post. I think if you really knew me - you would think I'm an anxious neurotic mess.

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  13. If you really knew me......you'd know that I am still to scared to show the skeleton's in my closet.....

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  14. If you really knew me...you'd know that despite an outwardly confident appearance, I'm extremely insecure and a bundle of nerves most of the time.

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  15. That show was filmed like 5 minutes from me! It was all over the local news.

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  16. We love you just the way you are!!!


    Melinda

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  17. If you really knew me, you'd know that I have an extremely difficult time making conversation with people I barely know. I am getting better, but it is still a painful experience for me.

    If you really knew me, you'd know that I too take "happy pills" for anxiety. It REALLY pisses me off when people think that there is something wrong with needing medication. (I've been criticized for taking Lexapro.) It isn't that I need my Lexapro to be happy, but I certainly need them to keep the anxiety and all that goes along with it at bay.

    If you really knew me, you'd know that I try to come across as a confident person, but quite often I am second guessing myself.

    You DO know that I LOVE YOUR BLOG, and even though we've never met, I LOVE YOU! :)

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  18. I love this post,... maybe i should do it too!!!

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  19. first of all THANK YOU for stopping by my blog today so that i could follow you back here. I love this post. I haven't seen the show but i just stopped and set my DVR to record it. I have a daughter who turns 15 in August...to say i am a little skeeeeeeeeeeerd is an understatement. so anything we can watch together that gets the conversation started is a good thing.

    i am most def going to have to follow in your footsteps here and create a "if you really knew me" post...FABULOUS!!

    i am also going to follow you now, i like what ya got going on!

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  20. I am a big reality tv freak! I cannot believe I missed this! This is a great post! LOVE it! I am not sure if my readers could take it if I wrote one! LOL

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  21. I cannot get you to load up on my blogroll! It will not update your post! ??? Is it just me?

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  22. NO, not just you Missy, I have that problem with some of my favorite blogs too.

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  23. Georgie, Lovely post. We are so similar in many ways and I am shocked to see how many of us are suffering from anxiety and depression. I just started meds about a week ago and it is helping. I will have to look for that show too.

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  24. thanks for the comment on the fork jewelry for the wedding shower. I feel more secure giving them the items now.

    If you really knew me you would know that I possibly am a shopaholic that doesn't have the money to shop so I make a lot of crafting stuff to fulfill my need to procure things.....then I give them away. =)

    Case in point: I just finished making 2 clutch purses and 2 vintage clothespin aprons. I need help! =)

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  25. If I may, first thank you for coming by the Oklahoma Patriot. And thank you for your kind words. As I am a fan of my own opinion, I'd like to give it here.

    First, being shy is not a bad thing. Too many people these days are like myself. Self important and self deluded in their importance to others. My wife is shy and we compliment each other very well.

    Your children. God love you and bless you in your efforts there. I have 4 teenagers and I understand the difficulty in maintaining the balance between dictatorial management and best friend support. Not hard, but I've always let the kids know that my job title is "The Squeeky Toy and The Giver Of Pain."

    I'll play and support all day, but give me the reason and I'll test that butt. For the most part, my children are loving, respectful patriots like their father. (ahem. not breaking my arm on that back pat, but the shoulder is a bit sore)


    In short, if you knew me, I'm a warrior for those that I love; my family, my God, and my country. Those that respect and love those things, have my love and respect. Those that don't...

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  26. You don't know how I hate to say this, and I'm not copping out, but if you really knew me....all you'd have to do is read YOUR answers...then add that while I don't defend myself properly, I will gladly place myself in the line of fire when protecting someone else......or even an animal. So I'll add this: IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME, you'd wonder how I got this old without being shot.

    As for depression, I have been sitting, sleeping, and eating, in the same spot on the couch for three months now. I just had the doctor change my anti-depressant yesterday.....I hope THIS one works because, obviously, the old one wasn't.

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  27. Georgie, IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME, you'd know how much I admire you and the talented way you write your posts.....you'd also know that I HAD to take your post to MY blog, while trying to do justice to your wonderful idea. YES I left a link to this post, as well as giving full credit to the one that deserves it.

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  28. If You Really Knew Me then you would know I am agoraphobic when unmedicated. So, I take my meds with a care.

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  29. Georgie what a GREAT post! I need to watch that show. I could relate to a bunch of your "If you really knew me" posts.

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  30. you would know...

    that I wish I had gotten medication for depression and anxiety. It scares me to remember some of the thoughts that I had when the days were so very dark. Good for you for taking care of yourself sweet Georgie.

    I wish you and I could hang out at the next bloggy get-together. Would would sit in comfortable silence, watching all the other hummingbirds flit.

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  31. Great post Georgie! Don't you think that we all feel those ways really? Most people have "learned" to be outwardly social and even the one who seem to be the life of the party often have deep seated self confidence issues underneat...thanks for posting that and revealing a little of the real you. I truly love real people :) They're so much more genuine and make me feel comfortable around them.

    Katie

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  32. I haven't seen that show, but now I want to!!
    If you really knew me...
    1. I never really feel like I fit in. Even with my friends-I start wondering if any of these people are really friends or if I just hang out with them because I have no other choices. Sad.
    2. I feel the weight of the world sometimes. There is so much sadness and so much need out there. I feel like I am WAY fortunate to have what I have and I wish I could give back more than I do. Everyone can make a difference, but there isn't that many that do, so I feel like I have to do more to make up for them....and it's a hard burden to carry sometimes.
    3. I mentally am the fattest kid always. When I'm in a room with people, I sometimes think about how they all pity me for being bigger than them.

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  33. That bit about before the big blogger meet-up, eh, I probably would've been sitting in the next car doing the same thing... I would so love to go to one, but I doubt I would have the confidence to walk right in there alone!

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  34. If you really knew me, you would know that I am completely insecure in group settings. It is not "shyness". It is the inability to interact. I find myself pretending in most situations where I am faced with having to participate in group conversations. My heart begins pounding out of my chest, I feel the blood rising in my face and all the while, I crack jokes, mostly about myself, just to get through the whole scenario. I think this is what they call social anxiety disorder. By the way Georgie, thanks for following me. I am now up to 2! haha

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  35. I am not shy, but I do come across as a SNOB and carry myself as uppity, even in high school. One of my girlfriends recently told me why. I have a rare gift that she has observed. I "think and present" myself and my words properly in public differently than when I am in a relaxed environment. Does that make sense? Maybe Abby and I are a lot alike! Thanks for sharing this and I am gonna have to look up that show! Love you girl!

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  36. Love that you keep it real girl! I want you to know that you are gifted, funny & encouraging! If you really knew me you'd know that I want to have a faith based training biz one day.

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  37. I love your honesty! If you really knew me you'd know that I have a great book to recommend that helped me once. It's a great book to keep in the car when you are waiting in the carpool line to pick up kids from school or waiting on them at the orthodontist. It's called, "The Introvert Advantage, How to Thrive in an Extrovert World" by Marti Olsen Laney

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  38. When I was a teacher I did this with my high school students as a writing exercise. It was so powerful, and sometimes heartbreaking. If you really knew ME, you'd know that sometimes I struggle to not be materialistic and to just be content with what I have, and that I want to be less critical of others. You'd know that I love performing arts - especially dance - and that I used to dream of being a professional ballerina.

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  39. If you really knew me....

    Wait!! You do! LOL! I'm not shy so everyone knows me! LOL!

    Great post. I'm so glad you are getting help for the depression and anxiety. You've been through an awful lot and it's okay to need some help.

    You've got great friends who are here to support and encourage you! Love you!

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  40. I laid on the couch last night..and watched that show for the first time! It truly is a wonderful thing they are doing! Love the concept!

    And this post....Brilliant!

    If you really knew me...you would know that I want nothing more than to be loved and accepted in this big world we live in.

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  41. I'm going to have to see this show. It sounds like it's just up my alley.

    I too was a very shy child, and people most often thought I was a snob. It sucked. I grew out of it, and am now overly boisterous, which sucks just as much sometimes.

    If you really knew me, you'd know that I struggle to forgive and forget, and am trying hard to live without worrying about everything.

    Great post, Georgie!!

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  42. Wow... I'd say that's a compliment that the Principal was intimidated by you. Usually it's the other way around!

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  43. You just never know what that principal meant by intimidating; maybe he/she had poor vocabulary or maybe she meant that you're too pretty. I LOL'd when reading that you told her anything in reply; you were assertive, which can be intimidating to people who are in positions of authority and are used to people fearing them.

    I'm really glad you got some help; there's no shame in that, and you are going to feel better. Love you, miss you.

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  44. Great post!
    It's funny how certain statement said by others just stick with us, isn't it.

    Hmmm...If you really knew me, you'd know... that I am socially awkward and I have a hard time believeing that people really like me. I feel so silly saying that :P

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  45. Very interesting! I've never seen the show but I love this blog post!

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  46. If you really knew me, you'd see that I'm quiet and shy, but only at first. People do think I'm being stuck up, but I'm just nervous. Then I lose my filter and all bets are off. I say whatever random and ridiculous thing that rolls through my head. It can be quite entertaining and also totally humiliating :)

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  47. My mom once told me that all mothers go to bed with guilt. The comment was completely out of the blue b/c Sam was just a baby. To this day, I'm so glad she said it...not b/c it's right/a good thing, but b/c it's yet another thing moms have in common.

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  48. I believe that you are generous and have faith that your kiddos will come around before you decide you're tired of sacrificing for them :) not that you would . . . I've never seen that show, but can imagine I would have a hard time watching a kid struggle like that. I like the concept for your post, Georgie <3 Good one!

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  49. I can talk all I want on my blog and on facebook, but get me in person and I am so shy too. I cant seem to keep a conversation going. And I also have to learn to shut my mouth around friends and family. I share way toooo much.

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  50. Good for your daughter and good for you!!!

    I am so glad that maybe I really know you (at least a little better). I am much the same way. One of the reasons I have so loved blogging is that I am able to get around my shyness.

    Thanks for sharing. And know that you are not alone. You have had a challenging year but you are still here. Sometimes we need a little help and it is absolutely nothing to feel badly about. Just take care of yourself.
    :-)
    Traci

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  51. Your daughter is very brave...think I know where she gets it from. I love the idea of using, "If you really knew me" as a post...I just don't think I'm brave enough.

    yet.

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  52. A great post...so glad that I did not miss it....

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  53. Wow, sounds a lot like me! Glad I read this post (as I haven't been around much lately) because it is nice to know you are not alone! Miss you!

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  54. You'd know that in high school I was exactly like Abby. And only later in life, more recently did I learn what my classmates really thought of me. They did think I was the one that was stuck up and snobby, when in fact I was just intimidated and shy. I spent those years thinking that most of them were full of themselves. Amazing how your perceptions change one you know what people think of you.

    You'd also know that the filter between my brain and my mouth doesn't work. It's been forever broken and it gets me in a lot of trouble.

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  55. If you really knew me, you'd know grateful I was when I saw your beautiful face in my blog. It meant a lot-lot.

    And that I am very impressed by how you can share yourself so freely here. Thank you for sharing & hugs for all you're going through.

    And that until I found this little blogging world, I had become invisible.

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  56. Georgie, thanks for being so honest! Isn't it amazing that we all look around at the people around us and we assume that they have it all together and we are the only ones with insecurities and struggles. But then the reality is that we ALL have things we struggle with, those voices in our head that tell us we are not good enough, pretty enough, capable enough, smart enough, etc. That's what mine tell me anyway! =) There is no better comfort then to hear someone say, "me too" and know we're not alone, we're all in the same boat.

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  57. Love your blog. I too am decision ally challenged. One of my favorite quotes is:
    Indecision may or may not be my problem. -Jimmy Buffet

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  58. Georgie, oh how I love this post!!
    I love ya just the way you are!
    There is nothing wrong with the meds, we all hit those periods of life sometimes.

    If you really knew me, you would know I'm still trying to find the "real me"

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  59. Hi! I can relate to many of your comments. There were 2 times when I had 4 teenagers at once! I posted a blog entitled "Who is this teenager in my house and what did you do with my child?"
    I also post about my therapy sessions. "Therapy is not for sissies..." and "Today therapy kicked my butt."
    The important thing is to become healthy however you have to do that!
    You know and understand yourself more than any other. Learn to listen to what you are saying. (Try not to visit Denial. That is where I have a vacation home!) Not just hear, but listen to YOU... you will hear words of wisdom and empathy that can change your life. It will affect all the things you wrote about.
    Enjoyed finding you!

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